Ballet & Relationships

Alina Cojocaru + Roberto Bolle in, Romeo &  Juliet  (Wearing her Gayners....) I don't know who the photo cred goes to but it was on tumblr via ballet-is-our-way-out.

Alina Cojocaru + Roberto Bolle in, Romeo & Juliet
(Wearing her Gayners….) I don’t know who the photo cred goes to but it was on tumblr via ballet-is-our-way-out.

In the never ending epic journey of dating, I have decided that people are like ballet techniques.  This post obviously has nothing to do with actual ballet, but I can’t sleep, and it is on my mind. So, we are now going to go through a history of my dating life, explained through ballet vocabulary. Excuse the lack of accents, I don’t want to open up my French keyboard for this post! THIS IS NOT A VOCAB lesson.

My first love was barre. We will call him Rogelio. Relationships that are like barre, well they are home.  Cliche? Maybe. But barre is home, and it is safe. It is where we learn the basics, get stronger, learn the most, and are able to focus on minute details on life.  Barre starts with plies, super relaxing, comfortable, and you open up.  Tendus become exciting, spicy accent ins, dinners (degages) out, romantic fondus, luxurious vacations in ron de jambs, and so on.  Derek was definitely barre, so supportive, so understanding, so loving, and always there. Why did Derek and I not work out? I wanted to explore outside of ballet, and he didn’t want to be barre anymore.  So, we went our separate ways and are still friends.

My second serious relationship… we will call him… Sebastien, he was like pirouettes. When their on, it feels so good, but it’s so easy to be off, and if you exhaust yourself trying they don’t happen.  The idea of twenty pirouettes seems awesome, or 32 fouettes, but… reality… they are just build for stamina. It was difficult with him, so that didn’t last, but you know the type of relationships or guy I am talking about.

After those two relationships, I then had a brief moment with… let’s call him Ernie, and he was totally adagio. Adagio relationships are slow, they build, basic but complex, you find your way through it with solid technique. That foundation gives you the freedom to let go and explore the music and the emotion. He was definitely super artsy. It was dreamy, it was lovely, it was romantic, and intense. The best moment was after a long promenade in attitude, and right when you are about to plie into elonge, you take a big breath and let go into a pure line. It was good stuff. Just not my cup of tea. I lacked the patience to figure out his complexities.

And then there was that moment of Fernando… He was definitely the mirror. The mirror that haunts you.  The idea of perfection from afar, but the reminder of how far from perfection you are. The negative remarks, the low blows, the passive aggressive behaviors. It was like the phantom relationship. The idea was good, but it is only a reflection, nothing real, nothing solid. It ovio didn’t last long.

Then there was Jonathan, definitely a waltz. It was pleasant, fun and frilly. Mostly going in circles, but nice to do. I think maybe I went around like 3 times, and then was like no thanks. I need something a tad bit more serious.

Then there was Edgar, and that relationship was like petite allegro– quick, sharp, short, direct, and to the point.

Oh, and I had a first date with a grand allegro, Francisco, and that was only a first date. I learned very fast that relationships that are large, expansive, travel fast, and fly at you aren’t my cup of tea either. Like on the first date calling you babe. -___-

I’ve tried dating younger guys, but they are like chaines, like going in circles, kind of makes you dizzy, and don’t travel very far… Then you find a younger one who seems more mature, and they are like piques and you think you are going some where but it really just moving in a circle. Then you find a younger guy who seems like he is put together but that is like a soutanou and is misleading and you land directly where you started just with the other foot in front.

Ughz, definitely avoid the men who are double tours… those flashy guys who want to buy you. No one care that you took me to Standard for dinner… Like no one. I would have been happy at in and out. Definitely, avoid men who are like pointe work, expecting to you to be on your game, on your box, foot winged and all that… They have too high of expectations—I’ve dated perfectionists like arabesques, but since I am a balanchine fan… we obviously went our separate ways.

And alas I am single. Haha. And yes, I really only date latinos. And yes this 800 word post happened… I’m slightly shamed.

2 responses to “Ballet & Relationships”

  1. No shame. It’s your truth. Someone out there will find it helpful. Relationships: can’t live with them / can’t live without them. Carry on. Do your best. Be all that you can be.

  2. I personally feel that all conversations should happen in ballet terms, ballet related or not! When the casting and choreography are right it is amazing!